I think every married woman who has completed one month (one year in my case) has to give her "very clear" answer to the much dreaded question......."when are you having babies"........."why don't you have them now.....everyone else is having babies"..........!!!!!!!!!!, Well, those exclamation marks is my shock, as I never thought I would get cornered with a straight forward question like that. I sip the glass of water(which I am having in my mind) and calm myself down and flash my pearly whites(now I know why I use colgate!!!) and say "Achamma(grandmother....well.....its HIS) I am studying and we are thinking about it.....Ya the hell we are!!! more like the Hell I am!!!
Its so overrated....I know......this conversation is meant to happen someday but when the question is put forth the real deal is AM I READY YET........I do know lot of women who juggle just about anything and everything in their life and hats off to them but sadly am not one among them. I still have trouble finding my books, doing my laundry and preparing my own meal and more importantly do I have it in me to be the perfect MOM...... I honestly don't know. People say that one just learns these kind of things and I am sure that I will love my baby to itsy bitsy pieces but am I ready to take the "RESPONSIBILITY" .......to look after another human being.....if I am not interested in having food I can just starve, but I wont be able to tell my child to starve huh....
Some of the answers that I have thought up that might pacify or enrage my husband's relatives:-
1) We ARE trying from day one!!!!
2) I would like to finish my PG and think about kids......which I will back up with (coz I will be getting piercing stares by then) but "We are trying from day one" :)
3) I am not a very responsible person....so I don't think its a good idea
4) Oh well, husband is having the "treatment" done(the most meanest one ever.....which I always think in my mind to use....but can't!!!)....am not THAT desperate........right.....
When I told my hubby he was like "Just humour them......they are old...we will try when you are ready"......well, thats a relief to hear coming from your better half. But how long.......I have no idea.
I strongly believe that a kid is much more appreciated in a family when he or she becomes a need and not a want.......and I am still waiting for my NEED to kick in......
As of now, am happy with my exam preps, blogs, life and ofcourse Family guy and True blood :D
11 comments:
I know wat you're talking about!!! Those questions are annoying & even more when ppl judge and get into the conclusion something is wrong huh :(
I can understand ur predicament. I dont know why people are after married couples, pushing them to have a baby. Agreed that they are family but isn't this supposed to be the decision of solely the husband and wife?
I agree with what u said.. unless you are ready there is no use having a baby just to please others!
hey i can so very well identify with u :P
Well..I'm 24 and unmarried and tht makes all my relatives soo worried..I'm a person who juz runaway from all their questions.. And now the word "Marriage" itself makes me sick!!
@appu:- yup its annoying! now am scared to go to my inlaws place bcoz of hus grandmother.She IS the grandma after all, so cant say anyting mean either :(
@TGAFA-ya I know, one has to be loving and at the same time take the ultimate responsibility for another precious human life, if u r not ready then y bother!!!
@rentu:-I hope ur achamma is NOT giving you a hard time :D
@sumitha:-thats a common scenario. Dont worry, marriage is not a big deal when you have found the right person, but its "his" relatives that u have to look out for.They won't be mean but just a bit too interested in ur life, that's all :).
In-laws can be a pain to deal with (I would assume), but just bare with them, they are old fashioned and eager to have grandkids. you can start trying when you are ready.
It just reminds me of movie name "Bandhukkal Shathrukkal" lol
I've never wanted children and when I met James who is much younger than me I told him that having children was not an option. I wanted to be honest and up front straight away as I wouldn't want him to be disappointed.
I think no matter what culture you are from everyone assumes that when you get married children are on the cards. It's not for everyone and it's big responsibility and they should be happy that you aren't taking it lightly.
@SS:- u r so rt! having kids is something that the partners should be deciding for themselves and the choice shouldn't be thrust upon them. its a huge responsibility and its just not for everyone, others ought to accept it and stop pestering!
LOL! That is such a cute post! A lot of baby talk eh?!? You wrote this post in August,What about now ,you have a baby???Yet???!! :)
I'm sure you'll be a great mommy seeing the enthusiasm bubbling in your blog!! :)
Following your blog :)
Post a Comment