Is it OK to feel jealous when one of your best friend is getting married? Or should I correct myself when I am already MARRIED!!!! Well, I have been married for a year, I do have a wonderful husband........but I do think.... do I have everything that actually counts???? My friend who got married right now did everything in perfect order...completed her graduation, spent one year cramming for a pg seat, got it the very next year and now got married to a really nice guy....ok so let me correct myself, I am not jealous......just "envious" when everything goes in the "chronological" order for someone else and not me. I am allowed to feel some emotion rt.....
I am now stuck with two major things in life, snag a pg seat and oh ya in the mean time get "pregnant" too......why are women always needed to do the eternal juggling? I can just see myself with my big fat radiology book in one hand and a crying baby on the other while my cell phone is jammed into my ear with my working shoulder and screaming to my husband about him having it easy.....So now I wonder....the things that we all consider too good to be true can sometimes be just that "too good to be true"!!!!
I now am at a stage when I am actually doing hide and seek with the society 'coz am so fed up with questions from friends asking me "Didn't you get a pg seat yet?" duh! if I did do they think I would be waiting for them to ask me that question.......I would be howling from the rooftops!!!!! and ya ofcourse not to forget the sweet questions from "his" relatives....."When are we going to see the lil ones" ohhhhhh F*&^.....sorry about the language...
So now, am waiting patiently to turn into the "superwoman" who just about manages everything.....personal life and professional life with so much ease....and the glorious tag would be ......"still!!!! studying" mom or the "working" mom? Guess I will stick with the pic below :)
and the most dreaded question........am I ready for all those things said above.....well.....I guess......baby steps would be enough for now.......let me figure out a way to hold my radiology book straight and squabble with my husband.......atleast for now!!! :)
9 comments:
nice write-up senior..n ya i will have to face all this too i guess..so tensed about the pg entrance i should write next yr...nyways gud luck anju
hugs sweetie pie, dont worry :)
i can completely relate to this... When i completed graduation all my friends immediately started with their PG courses.. i went on to work, quit my first job, moved onto another job.. now my friends hav completed PG, bagged a nice job and are married.. some even have babies!!! And here i am.. wondering if i shud stick to this job, preparing for mba, wondering if ill get a seat, and if i DO get a seat, then take 2yrs to complete my PG and THEN get married!!! phew!! sorry to ramble but i can seriously relate to this.. am stuck too!!!
Sometimes i wish that i had blindly done what everyone else had done.. but then i dont think i would have been happy...
Hmmm... I guess things will settle down and fall into place on their own.. no use cribbing but i do feel envious sometimes...
I totally get what you are saying..I have always been the one who has done things differently my entire life in my friends circle..When people were getting married and having babies..I decided to work and become the woman I wanted me to be and then settled down and got married..Now, there is this pressure to have babies..But, relax and do things at your own pace sweety..Things do fall into place in its own time :)
@pavani:-dont worry, study hard for the pg seat....u will be fine :)
@rentu:- oh..thanks dear.u r so sweet
@chandana:-I am glad that ppl are able to relate to this issue. ya, even am hoping that things would fall back into plaze.
@natasha:-thanks for the wonderful comment...i sure do hope so :)
Wow I can totally relate to this post!!
It is SO normal to feel envious of friends when they're life seems to be going perfectly and yours seems to be...well, not. Lol.
I have a few friends who seem to be leading perfect lives right now. They have amazing careers, they are engaged, and they have fabulous bodies. It makes me want to cry. I just can't understand where my life went wrong!
I like to think that our turn will come. Some time in the future, it will seem to everyone else that WE are living the perfect life. We will be that superwoman! And all those girls, with their crazy, chaotic lives, will look at us with envy! :P
Love this post!
Hey u made me think as I am so very desperate to get married
Hi, I have been reading your posts recently. Although, I must admit I am not a regular follower of your blog, but I do skim through when I get time.
This particular post was interesting, so decided to comment on it.
I do not think you should be worrying so much and let me tell you why !
I graduated with a degree in engineering and started working for an MNC in India. Got married in 2007, had to be away from my husband for 2 years, eventually moved together in 2009, stayed together for 6 months and in 2010 my husband decided to move to USA for further education. He left and I had to concentrate on my job, prepare for GRE, TOEFL and above all had to secure admission in the same school.
I scraped through, came here , secured 80% funding, had to work like crazy.
Today I am working on my research, my husband has graduated and he has moved out of the city to look for better jobs. I am alone again.
So, I think you are not alone. There are lot of people struggling like this to get better education and thereby a better life.
Today at 30, I also have to face questions from family about pregnancy. But, I believe people ask just for the sake of asking; they don't really expect an answer.
All you have to do is smile and say "we'll see how it works out!!"
Good luck.
N Menon
anju...i can totally relate to this..right now am in the same state..sitting with harrisons and hoping that everything i read goes inside simultaneously worrying about the answer am gona give my mom in law if she asks when we are planning pregnancy;p
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